Had a real hard cry last night. I guess I really know the outcome of this relationship already. Really do not bear to end it. Shall we just talk things out, know how each other is really feeling and work out a new life? Seeing Elaine blissfully in loev now after the talk they had that night, it really made me want to work things out with him that way too.
Slept with the lights on. Was just afraid to be in the dark. When I really felt that I could fall asleep any moment, I switched off the lights. As expected, he did not call me last night. I guess it is because it is month-end. Or maybe...
It felt like today is a Saturday at work. There was not much emails and faxes to clear.
From around 11am, I was beginning to take reservations from the tray to process already.
During lunch, Faisal joined Rebecca, Darlene and me. Suddenly, he said that his wife ever told him that he can fool around outside. But, told him that he must never never be caught. Rebecca agreed with him. However, Darlene and I just stood there in silence. Darlene would never agree to that I know. For me, of course not as well. But what he continue to say made me think further. If you love a person, set them free. I guess, as long as they know their own limits, it is totally fine for them to hang around with the opposite sex.
Was able to leave at 4pm sharp. Was thinking, "Should I go and pluck my eye-brows?" However, was just too lazy to do so. Headed home straight.
Am still thinking...
- Should I call more people to my birthday party?
- Should I message or call him later?
- Should I go and study part time next year? If I do, I will take the same course as him. Will he think that I am just sticking to him? But he knows, I always have the interest in accouting right?
I was missing him the whole day, am still missing him now and I guess will miss him EVERYDAY.
I am just so in love with him now. He is like a part of my body which nothing can seperate me from already. GOD, SAVE ME... HIM... US!!!
{&i'll hold on till the end of time-}
12:28 PM
